Wednesday 5 May 2010

I'm Gonna Be A Bear

In this life I'm a woman.
In my next life I'd like to come back as a bear.

When you're a bear, you hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months.
I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that too.

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partly grown, cute cuddly cubs.
I could definitely deal with that.

If you're a mama bear everyone knows you mean business.
You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.
I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling.
He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yep, gonna be a bear!

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